Telling lies with integrity

I am due to hand this in for my 2nd assignment, as my creative writing piece, but I thought it was also relevant to post on here and I think it is quite 'tongue in cheek humorous', so I have decided to post it here aswell.





The Times Online


2nd May 2008

What has the devil ever done for us?

By Oliver Kendall

The devil has received some bad press over the years. That is probably the biggest understatement you will see printed in this publication this year! He has been held responsible by his accusers for everything from the death of Christ to the 9/11 World Trade Centre bombings. He isn’t without his fan base though. My contacts at http://www.lucifer.com/ tell me the story of how the devil, or Lucifer as he is known between friends, was thrown out of heaven by God because he began to question his demand for blind dogma. As he left heaven, he was christened ‘the king of lies’, his ‘lies’ being his questioning of the blind faith in God that he saw all around him.

I was lucky enough recently, on my latest visit to Lucifer’s dark realm, to be granted an interview with the demon himself. He was on form and out to set the record straight. “I’m fed up of all the negative press I’ve been getting. I am simply trying to promote critical thinking among the people of earth. They are being led blindly by God and they deserve to know the truth. I only want the best for mankind. That is why I have sent them the most creative music, the best drugs, the temptation to experiment, even the ability to lie.” He continued; “My gift of the lie is very personal, as I have been named the king of lies myself. Humans display their most creative tendencies when engaging in the way of the lie. They are testing each other, critically interacting with their environment and adapting the best way to gain what they need from their given situation. It was imperative that they received the gift of the lie, without it, they would never have survived a day on earth. They are mistaken in thinking God will save them. Without the lie, they are defenceless to the dangers of random circumstance, over which God has no control.”

It seems that we may need to re-evaluate who we can rely on to look after our best interests!